Why Creeping Is Ruining Your Love Life

Creeping - the art of internet stalking your ex boyfriend/girlfriend, future love interest, hot girl that sits in class with you via their social media sites. But not just stalking their photos and statuses actually going back years and years to see exactly what your future "husband" ate on July 11th, 2007.

Okay yeah, we all do it. Maybe not to the extent of creeping back years and years but you know that you've been on that certain person's Facebook's sorting through albums and statuses. For the longest time, I never really saw the point of creeping, I really thought it was a waste of time. What was in the past was clearly in the past, right? But in the day and age we live in, it's so easy to stalk someone's Instagram a couple weeks ago and see if your boyfriend "liked" another girl's photo or commented on some racy pic she posted.

It made me come to the conclusion, it really sucks to have to live like that. Why would I want to be in a relationship where I kept feeling like I wasn't good enough, you know? It was such a huge relief to have that weignt lifted off of me to be out of that relationship. But nevertheless, it sucks having to live like that and today we live in a very sneaky virtual world. What inspired me to write this blog post was after a concert I recently attended. A cute couple (or so I thought) was sitting in front of me and my girlfriend. They were hugging and kissing and dancing and all and all things seemed like they were going well. The girl left to go to the bathroom multiple times and ever time the guy she was with was on his phone texting 3 different girls and direct messaging girls on Instagram. I was so disgusted.

But as disgusted as I was, I wasn't surprised. It unfortunately is the world we live in today. You can't even trust your date for a whole 5 minutes to be faithful while you go to the restroom. Why is that?

I know a lot of factors go into why some relationships work and why some fail. But in my opinion, creeping on someone's Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/LinkedIn/etc really sets you up for failure. The reason it sets you up for failure is because social media isn't real. The average social media user only displays what they want you to see on their sites. It gives you a false sense of a person - before you even get the chance to get to know the REAL him/her. Unfortunately, the Internet gives us access to nearly anything and everything, we can know if our crush has had 30 girlfriends or none, we can know where he works or if he doesn't have a job. Creeping leaves us constantly judging without truly knowing anything for sure.

The movie, Enough Said, I had just watched with my boyfriend was with one of my favorite actors who recently passed James Gandolfini. The film was about a divorced woman who decides to pursue the man she's interested in learns he's her new friend's ex-husband. So they gossip and the ex wife talks all this crap about her ex husband so of course the other woman who is secretly interested in him starts to listen. I guess my point is by listening, judging and taking someone else's opinion instead of forming your own really left her with nothing but heartbreak at the end.

This is my challenge for you. The next time you find yourself dating someone or becoming interested in don't ruin all the fun by pulling out the cobwebs in your new beau's closet via social media. So what if his ex is cute, SO ARE YOU! There are a reason why things didn't work out and why you are where you are in life. He/her might just suprise and exceed all your expectations - but you gotta him/her them that chance to do so!

Happy happy dating!

Xoxo,

A Guy's Girl