The Startling Truth of Living With A Spinal Cord Injury

I am not one to compare and weigh problems but this week has been eye opening in many ways to me that I would like to share with you.

I do well with mental pictures so I’m going to paint one for you. Imagine a young, vibrant 15-year old girl who really never had a care in the world. She got a long well with others, did decent in school, loved playing sports, and had an amazing family and set of friends. Pretty normal, right? Or so I thought…

Until a freak accident changed EVERYTHING.

The reason everything is in caps is because I want to stress how much my life was changed. I went from worrying about what dress I was going to wear to formal to am I going to make it till tomorrow. In the blink of an eye, my whole world was flipped inside out and upside down.

All the things I used to enjoy doing I couldn’t do anymore.

Unlike most kids, I really enjoyed going to school. But unfortunately, I missed so much school while I was in the hospital, I had to be homeschooled for a year to keep up and maintain my intense physical therapy regimen. Because there was no way I wanted to live in this wheelchair, forever.

I think that’s why i love going to school so much now because there was a time I really just wished I could be like a normal kid and go to school.

But so much has changed since high school, I have regained so much more function and am some much more independent than I ever was or ever dreamed of being. I am so thankful I am able bodied enough to drive a car, attend USC, and be able to challenge my mind with some of the smartest students in the WORLD.

But sometimes it’s really frustrating. It’s frustrating because there are some days I wish I was a normal girl/student. I wish I was able to ride a bike to class in 5 seconds instead of taking so much time to get from A to B.

Sometimes, I want to hurt the people in my class that contemplate whether they should go running before or after their next class, LIKE AT LEAST YOU CAN RUN AND USE YOUR LEGS. UGH.

Sometimes, I want to hit them in between the eyes with knowledge with how grateful they should be for everything they have. But I do not. Instead, I have to hear all the complaining on Facebook from people who treat the social media outlet like a diary. They complain about the littlest things ranging from traffic, a bad breakup, a stolen wallet. etc.

As some of those things are without a doubt irritating, they ARE NOT the end of the world. I repeat they are not the end of the world.

Okay, regroup Natalie.

Some things people are praying for you have, so it’s time everyone starts being a little more thankful and a little less ungrateful.

Let me put it to you this way, you think you have it hard? Imagine not having use of your hands to take notes/ do a test in class and relying on someone else to do everything for you. Imagine having to rely on someone to eat because again your hands do not work. While you’re riding your bike around skipping about your day, some are struggling to get to class on time. Because they have lost all motor neuron movement in their hands. While you celebrate landing your first internship, they celebrate being able to feed themselves independently. While you’re out with friends, they are home with nerve pain (which is really common for quadriplegics). While you’re complaining about driving in traffic, they wish they could drive.

One of the things that tend to bother me the most is the constant staring. I get the weirdest looks from people, all shapes and sizes, like what have you never seen a wheelchair? It can sure weigh on your self esteem if you let it. I like to think of myself as a celebrity, they get stared at all the time for being who they are, I don’t know, it helps sometimes. I feel their pain though, it’s not a fun thing to get stared at when you’re just trying to go about your day like everyone else.

Again, I am in no way shape or form writing this blog post for you to feel sorry for me or anyone who may be stuck with a condition like mine in life. I am writing to challenge you to start opening your eyes to what is happening around you. I want you to start looking at your life and seeing how amazingly lucky you are to live the life you’re living.

I was just like you. I focused on everything that didn’t matter and I wish I could go back and be more gracious but you can’t go back in life, only forward. So that is what I’m going to do, continue to move forward.

It is time you stop judging people who get around differently than you, or look differently than you because accidents happen all the time. You can go from being “normal” to being paralyzed in a blink of an eye. Everyone is going to go through something in their life, some bigger or smaller than others. But life happens and how you respond to it shapes who you are on the inside. Sounds cheesy but is the most important part of a person, their core.

So tell me one thing, I am able to see who you are on your outside shell but what kind of person do you see on the inside?

Xoxo,

A Guy’s Girl